I’m looking for it. Maybe you’re looking for it too. The magic bullet…the secret ingredient…the key to eternal happiness. We all deserve to find it, you know.
What I have learned to accept is the fact that the things in my life that bring me pleasure won’t necessarily bring me genuine happiness. Authentic happiness takes work.
Several years ago, I read Dr. Martin Seligman’s book Authentic Happiness. Seligman is a professor in the Psychology Department at the University of Pennsylvania, and his body of work can be found on his website: Authentic Happiness.
I am not an expert in the study or application of positive psychology, but since being introduced to Seligman’s findings, I have made efforts to change my thinking about what it takes to be happy. I believe, he is on to something.

In a nutshell, happiness can be achieved through gratifying experiences rather than pleasurable ones.Spa days make me happy. Movies make me happy. A great meal that has been prepared by someone else, and will be cleaned up by someone else, makes me happy too. Those things are all great, but they won’t keep me happy for the long haul. They are pleasurable activities, not gratifying ones. Pleasure comes in an ice cream cone and a trip to the mall to collect the skirt on sale. There is generally little effort involved in a pleasure.

Don’t get me wrong, there is no reason to forego a pleasurable activity when it is offered, but we can’t depend on those times we smile to become the deeper joy that is found in doing something more gratifying. Gratifying activities are usually difficult to begin: a hard workout, an intense piece on the piano, a challenging book or doing work in the garden. There is generally a sense of accomplishment and achievement with a gratifying activity, and that is where happiness resides.

We each hold our own proverbial key to happiness. Identify something you enjoy doing that you can pursue a little bit every day. Force yourself to add some gratifying work to your everyday routine, and I would venture to guess that authentic happiness will soon follow.

Some gratifying ideas:
Join a book club and read tough books
Sign up for a race and adopt a workout regimen to prepare
Plant a garden
Volunteer at a shelter or food bank
Prepare a meal from scratch
Create a scrapbook
Become multi-lingua.
Learn an instrument
Put together a 1000-piece puzzle
Paint a picture (even if it is by numbers)
Write a letter to someone who could use a note of encouragement
Train your dog to do circus tricks

You get the idea. The list of possibilities is endless. And the happiness available…well that’s endless too!

Read more from Meagan at Choosing to Grow and follow her on Twitter.